I hope mine doesn't look like that
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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