So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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