Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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