Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
