is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
