I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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