If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
