so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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