About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Rumble strips road head = magical
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
