is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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