Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
