I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Randomize
