I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
