If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
