a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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