4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
