i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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