If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize