lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
