guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
