I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
