And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Randomize
