so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
