I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I got inside last night via doggy door
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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