I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I need moral support for this bender
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
