Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
