I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I just googled if crying burns calories
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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