I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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