Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
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