he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Randomize
