sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
