sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
