giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
