I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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