No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
