Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
