Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize