dude i'm inner monologue high
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
