just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
