State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
