the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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