I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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