We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
