wanna go halves on a baby?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
