Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize