Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
