i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
