Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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