Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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