Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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